As a life coach and a human being (no tentacles or fangs here), I have found that awareness was one of the most important lessons I learned through achieving my life coaching accreditation as well as through my coaching clients.
It is only when you become aware of a habit or a way of thinking that you have been following such as negative self talk or criticizing others, that you can do something about it i.e. take responsibility.
You may be asking, "How do I become aware?". Simple. Observe your life. If you go through your day and do not make an effort to learn something new, whether through increased knowledge on a subject or about yourself, then I find it hard to believe that you are living the life that you truly want and strive for. It is only through observation and learning that we can better ourselves and push ourselves to achieve more in our lives and live up to the potential that we possess. Now I know not everyone is aware that they have potential and that is often when people come to me for coaching and wonder some of the following:
- Why can I not get a job I like?
- Why can i not find Mr./Ms. Right?
- Can I really do this?
- Do I have what it takes?
- Is this all there is to life?
For example, I was out with my friend the other day and the waitress delivered a plate to my friend. I instantly jumped in with a
"Thank you"
to the waitress and then she was gone. My friend gave me a look and said nothing. Curiosity killed the cat and I asked, "What did I do wrong?". She made me aware that I never allowed her to say thank you for herself and made her feel as if she was being thought a lesson by her Mum and felt it made her appear rude. I apologised and have since stopped doing this to the point where other friends and family members who obviously were biting their tongues all along, had noticed the change. All learning, all improvement.
So if something is not going right for you such as never getting that second interview or dates never working out, ask friends or family to help you to become aware of anything you may say or do and then it is up to you to take the next step. If you cannot take criticism, work on that first as family and good friends often are very honest and you may not be ready to hear what they have to say. They are helping, remember!
To check out Siobhan's column in The Kilkenny People, just click here.
